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This is the new 100 megapixel Hasselblad – it’s called the H6D and costs 35,000€ – yes, thirty five thousand. This is what you get when you’re paid humongous amounts of money to produce wall sized photos.

I too would like to bring my Hasselblads up-to-date – sadly I don’t have a spare 35,000€ so I’ll have to settle for one of these  – it fits on the older Hasselblad bodies, and ‘only’ costs 7500€ – a snip, I hear you saying.

Well yes, but I’m far from having 7500€ to spare so I think it’s time to launch a Kickstarter and get me some dosh…

Clip it all together and it looks like this

At the moment we have planes mysteriously dropping out of the skies, hairy f**kwits in Syria killing people by throwing them into vats of nitric acid and what are people most keen on reading about? Kim and/or Kylie f**king Kardashian and who’s got the most deformed arse, lips, both.

Frankly we deserve this rubbish – I mean seriously, we simply cannot be interested in this, can we? Rhetorical question – as yes, a staggering number of people actually seem to be interested, but I can’t quite understand why.

K2 (Which actually started life as the name for a mountain – go figure…) is billed as a ‘star’, and an ‘International’ one too. Why? Possibly because the has quite a number of planets orbiting around her…I can’t think of any other reason. I mean, she isn’t really useful either – what does she do? Aside from take pictures of her blown-up lips, not much. I suppose you could use her to park your bike if she was kneeling down…but even so I’m not really sure I’d want to.

It’s all very frustrating….

Of course, the subject of this rant is the one and only Kim Kardashian – she’s the one standing in the way of a nice shot of a white Range Rover in this recent picture.

Don’t be mistaken, the ‘strings’ on her legs are designed to expand as she tries to put on under-sized jeans… this strange person is supposed to be a style icon, and I suppose for her grumpy husband she’s the bees knees, but for the rest of the world she’s the only person who can make Balmain or Gucci look like a dustbin liner.

She’s made millions, principally due to a ‘sex’ tape from several years ago, but I’m not clear what she’s supposed to do – you know, like how useful is she? Is she worth copying? Should we model our lives around her ideas/lifestyle/enormous bottom?

My other favourite, Justin Case, sorry, Blieber trys to sing, so I suppose, to some extent, this ‘justifies’ his worth, but this totally disproportioned ‘person’ does nothing aside from taking pictures of herself pouting. Give her credit though, she actually managed to sell a few copies of a book of her ‘pouts’ – so who’s crazy now?

Firstly I must state that I have a huge respect for blind people, and the people who help them – as a photographer I understand how crushing it must be to lose a sense, and can only imagine what it must be like to try to live in todays complicated world.

This said, I do think that it’s a bit of a piss-take on the part of Leica to bring out the Leica M-D (Typ 262) This is a ‘modern’ digital rangefinder with a state-of-the-art full frame 24mp sensor – but it seems it has been designed for a minority group – the blind.

So why am I led to think this? Well, when I’ve taken my picture and I take the camera away from my eye to have a look at the result on the rear screen, well, I can’t – they forgot to build one in. You would be forgiven for thinking that for the price of 5900€ (Body only) they could have included a screen, but no – Leica have decided, in their wisdom, that ‘real’ (Ken Rockwell?) and / or blind photographers don’t need a screen.

Is it any wonder that these people are in a ‘niche’ market…?

Yes – my old ‘friend’ the Beibs is up and ranting away again – this time all about photos…

It seems that Justin Beiber has had enough and feels ‘used’ – the reason? He’s fed up with people stopping him in the street and asking to take a photo with him. He has even announced on Instagram that he « …doesn’t owe anybody » and that people shouldn’t expect that, just because they’ve bought one of his albums that they have a God given right to have a photo with their idol.

Well, actually in some ways I agree (What???) it can’t be easy being followed at every step by hordes of fans and admirers, who, incidentally, were the same idiots who actually put him where he is today. The reason he started ‘singing’ in public was to become famous and earn lots of money – well, he’s done that and now considers that he’s too important to be treated like every other ‘pop’ star.

Personally I agree – I think all images of this f***-wit be removed from the Internet and we all try to forget he ever existed – along with the talent-less Kardashian sisters. These time-wasters need to be expunged from our collective memories.

So Justin, give me half your dosh and I’ll happily pose for your ‘heart-broken’ fans and admirers (all with a collective intelligence of a bath towel).